Longing for someone – or something – can be even more thrilling than getting what you want. That knowledge has inspired endless movies, but what do real people yearn for? We asked the question in Glasgow
In a world of instant gratification, is it any surprise that many of us have fallen back in love with the idea of “yearning”? Running counter to much of today’s on-demand culture, yearning melds desire and distance, nostalgia and uncertainty; longing for something, or someone, can sometimes appeal in a way that getting exactly what you want cannot.
The resurgence of yearning – especially in the romantic sense – has been one of the biggest entertainment themes of the last couple of years: from The Summer I Turned Pretty and Heated Rivalry to the latest big-screen adaptation of Sense and Sensibility, the allure of unmet desire and slow-burn love has topped hasty happy-ever-afters. TikTok remains awash with recommendations for those who want to #feeltheyearn.
But yearning encompasses more than just romantic infatuation. You might be pining for a particular place or longing for a different time in life. With this in mind, we took to the streets to ask: what are you yearning for right now?
A place by the sea
I’m from the north-east of England, so I yearn for a place beside the sea. I yearn for somewhere that I lived before that is probably no longer there anyway – it’s more the idea of it: something I had that wouldn’t necessarily be there if I went back. I think yearning can be seen as a weakness, so if people are pining more than they used to, they may not want to share it. Elizabeth Kennedy, 63, retired
Friendships and relationships
I feel as if I pine for things I have a lot – I place so much value on my friendships and my relationships, and I yearn for them in the quiet moments, even though I have them. I think people have always yearned – Virginia Woolf was pining for things, for example – but I feel like people are pining more openly these days, especially on social media. Adam Hamill, 24, student
Doing MMA at the gym
I would say I yearn for things, yeah. I’m a mixed martial artist and I’ve not been able to go to my gym in a while, so I’m yearning to go right now. It’s natural to yearn for something – you learn to enjoy the process. If I haven’t been to the gym for a week, it can feel more worthwhile when I finally do go than if I had been every day. Erys, 26, student
Home
Recently, I’ve been yearning for home, back in Oman. Hopefully I will get to go for Christmas or the holidays. I feel like, lately, people have been romanticising yearning a lot – it may have been present before, but now people are labelling the feeling and emphasising how much they enjoy the act of yearning. Manar, 21, student
A day off
I’ve been working quite a lot, so I’m yearning for a day off! I think people are yearning for human connection a lot more definitely because everything is online these days – shopping, dating, whatever. I think the human touch is missing for a lot of people – a bit of loneliness maybe. People are longing for something a bit deeper. Declan, 30, actor/salesman
Nothing
I don’t yearn; I know a lot of people who do, but that’s not me. I just take each day as it comes and I believe that what is for you will not go by you. It’s a mindset: if I can’t afford something – a bigger house, for example – I don’t get it. I’m quite happy with what I’ve got. A lot of the things I think people yearn for are materialistic, but I keep my things for years and years, rather than following the fashions. Ann Walker, 67, retired
Meeting my K-pop idol
Whether I have a small goal or a big dream, I would plan step by step to reach the thing I am yearning for. For example, I’m a K-pop fan and there are some idols that I really like – especially Anton from Riize; he is very handsome. I yearn to work with these idols, and currently I am studying contemporary art theory. I think yearning can be enjoyable, as long as you are not too anxious about it; you just have to wait. Yuntan, 22, student
Family get-togethers
I just yearn for our family get-togethers – I miss all that. I’ve just been organising a get-together next year, because you’ve got to book these things in advance. But I don’t think I’m longing for anything any more than usual. I’m quite happy – I’ve got my health, I can get out and about, and that’s the main thing. Elizabeth Harvey, 72, retired nurse
Very little
I see a lot of people yearning for a mythical UK that they think existed about 50 years ago, although it never really did. It’s like a really low-grade nostalgia. On a personal level, I don’t really yearn – I’m extremely content. That may be because I don’t have a television. I do go online, but I believe life’s too short to spend it staring at a gogglebox. Steve, 63, self-employed stage manager
My best friend
I yearn for my best friend – even though she is here! I want her under my skin. I sometimes yearn to go to places, but with a specific somebody, a special somebody – I yearn more for people than things. Everyone is different – and not everyone enjoys the experience of longing, but it can be fun. Delchie, 19
Holidays and experiences
I think people maybe yearn for other people, but not so much for “things” because everything is so accessible now. People don’t like to wait for anything; they’re not really patient any more. I like the idea of yearning, that it can take time to appreciate an experience. I’m on holiday with my friend just now – celebrating 10 years of our friendship – and we have been yearning for this trip! Madeline, 24, student
Nothing at the moment
I’m not yearning for anything specific right now. I think the idea of yearning has become overused – people will be single for, say, four months and they’ll say they’re “yearning” to be in a relationship again. But you can tell when someone is really yearning for something, and when it’s just a buzzword. Reece Ruddick, 18, student
